The Most Impossible Route

I was praying the other day and I brought up how impossible something felt, and that I just wasn't sure how the Lord was going to accomplish it, and I had this thought go through my head:

"Cassandra, have you ever thought that maybe I'm taking you on the most impossible route so that you can see that nothing is impossible for me?"

Boom. Mic drop. 

I mean, I would have done the mic drop. The Lord doesn't do that; he is kind and loving, and as I was begging for understanding, He allowed me a glimpse into the reasoning behind His game plan for my life. 

Are you all reading the new Come Follow Me curriculum that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints released this year? One of the scripture study verses the other day was Luke 1:37: For with God, nothing shall be impossible. Right. I had just studied this, and had been thinking about it for a few weeks; was it really a surprise that the Lord was reminding me of the teaching that has been on my mind all month?

Do I really believe that? Do I really believe that nothing is impossible for the Lord? Have I ever thought that going the most impossible route in my life would allow me to gain a greater testimony that with the Lord, nothing really is impossible? Have I ever considered what it means to struggle so much? Have I ever seen the greater good over the current trial? 

When I was 12 my dad was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. This isn't news for most of you, Readers, as I talk about this a lot, so, pardon my quick summary of how that disease has played out in his life. At first it didn't really hit me how awful it was going to be. He had to give himself a shot daily, and he couldn't get himself into stressful situations, which, being an attorney, was easily avoidable, right?.... We could always tell when he was overdoing it because he would start limping really badly. It wasn't until about 5 years ago that his sickness became real for me. He started having trouble walking - like, majorly. He started 2014 walking by himself, and by the end of the year was in a wheelchair. Just like that. And quickly after that everything in his body started shutting down. I've watched him lose the use of so much, and to go from this organized, attorney minded father, to barely able to hold his scriptures during scripture study. It has SUCKED.

And I've complained a lot. To the Lord. I've begged for him to be healed. I've begged for a cure. And, when none of that occurred, I begged for understanding. Sometimes in life all we can ask for is understanding, and that is what I got. 

Understanding of the Plan of Salvation. Understanding that this life is not the end. A firm testimony in Christ's Atonement, and that He has the power to heal my dad in the next life.

Impossible, the world would have me believe, for my dad to ever be my dad again - that wise, driven man who pushed us to be better. Impossible for him to ever be cured of this disease. And yet, the Lord reminds us that with Him, nothing is impossible. With Him, all can be made right. With Him, we will all be made perfect one day; we won't just go back to what we were - we will be better. We, if we follow His commandments and endure to the end, will become just like God. The world would have us believe that that is impossible, but it's not. Christ has promised that it's not. Through my studies, and through my begging for understanding about my dads illness, I have come to know that it is not impossible. 

What if my dad went the most impossible route through this life, just so the Lord could prove that He could heal him? Allowing not only my dads testimony to grow, but testimonies of all those around him as well. 

Isn't that amazing? To think that, as we're struggling, and as we're feeling helpless and hopeless, Christ is there, promising the impossible. Assuring us that it will all work out. Loving us enough to take us the most impossible route, just so that we can see how powerful His Atonement is. That is love, Readers. He doesn't just want us to succeed; He wants a miracle to occur.

Dang. 

That's powerful. 

And, as I was sitting on my bed, reflecting on this thought the other day, I was reminded that this was the best plan for me. That since I need so much reassurance about my self worth, this was going to be the way for me to always know this was right. That the way my life ended up was the best way. The Lord was taking me the most impossible route to prove to me how important and loved I am. To prove that I am worth the sacrifice He made for all mankind, to allow us to return home to our Father in Heaven. I am worth the struggle. I am worth the fight. I am worth proving my worth to. I am worth going the impossible route with. 

Readers, don't give up when the route you are on seems impossible. Those are the situations Christ knows best.