Don't Wait For Everything To Be Perfect

"Don't spend your time looking ahead, pleading for things to be over, and things to be different. Just stop. Stop looking backward. Stop yearning for the future. Today, where you are right now, is a joy. Today, right now, is the best place to be. Happiness does await us in this day. His blessings and promises are here, right now. He will not withhold His love and blessings from us just because we are at a different phase in our life." ~ Al Carraway, More Than the Tattooed Mormon

A few years ago I wrote a list of things I wanted to do/work on over the next few years of my life. I keep telling everyone I've accomplished everything I wanted to, and how I have no idea what to do next, but I guess that was kind of a lie ... because ... one of the goals I had was to stop comparing myself to other people. I mean, come on; that's hard. That's not something that is going to happen over night! That's a life long endeavor! Anyway, I read Al Carraway's book a few weeks ago, and I really started reflecting on happiness, and why I seemed to be struggling to achieve it. It's funny, because I do so much! I am constantly adventuring, constantly having new experiences, constantly meeting new people and trying new things ... I mean, my life is freakin awesome, Readers. This isn't me bragging; it's more me wondering why everything isn't bringing me as much joy as I'd like it to bring me. With all the adventures and excitement, how am I still so unhappy?

As I read this book, I realized a few things:

1) my prayers over the past 6 months have been more complaints than gratitude,

2) I had gotten focused on what I wanted, and not what the Lord wanted for me, and

3) that I had come to that situation because I was comparing myself to other people

It's that 3rd one that has been killing one. It's hard not to compare myself to other people. I really struggle when my friends start announcing their 2nd, 3rd, or even 4th pregnancies! I went to college with these people; why haven't I started my family yet? Why am I still here, in this situation? Heavenly Father, you have forgotten about me! You have forgotten about where I was supposed to end up! I had all this potential, and then you ABANDONED me.

..........

That's kind of been how my prayers have been going over the past several months. Bad, I know. And I realized that I wasn't HAPPY. I was constantly looking for more and more, and could not seem to figure out why I was struggling so much with being happy again.

As I was reading Al's book, More Than the Tattooed Mormon, perspective came back into my life. I was unhappy because I had been comparing my timeline to everyone else's. I had been wanting to go down their unique paths, instead of remembering that the Lord has a plan for me, and that I have ALWAYS been led to joy when I have chosen to follow Him. ALWAYS. Without a doubt.

And as I started rejoicing in what the Lord had given me - all the wonderful blessings that I have in my life, as well as promises to come - I started remembering that I am God's child, and He loves me, and He had not forgotten about me, but rather I had forgotten Him.

I started thinking about how God sees me, and prayed to see myself through His eyes, and guess what? The Lord answered. 

pc: rw inc.

It's funny when the Lord responds quickly to a prayer. It always catches me so off guard. These last few weeks the Spirit has been working overtime to remind me of my goodness; of my divine nature. Reminding me of the life lessons I've learned, and the obstacles I've overcome to get where I am today. Reminding me that I'm not good at holding grudges, but very good at forgiving others. Reminding me that I am a very loving person. Reminding me that I'm of worth to the Lord, and that's what matters most. 

Readers, don't get distracted from Christ by comparing yourself to other people. It's so easy to do that, and it only brings ungratefulness, which leads to a life of unhappiness. Have gratitude for what the Lord has given you now! Enjoy the journey as it is happening; don't get upset because others are going on different journey's! 

I went and saw Cinderella down at Tuacahn earlier this summer with some friends, and there's a quote that keeps running through my head: "Don't wait for everything to be perfect." Readers, we are blessed every day by the Lord; don't forget that. Even in those horrible, terrible, no good days, the Lord is there, by our side, carrying us on. He sees our potential, and He has not forgotten us! If you pray to know of your worth, I promise He will remind you of it. He did for me.