"What Are Men to Rocks and Mountains?"
One of my earliest memories involves my family sitting around the dinner table when we lived in Phoenix, my dad holding the pictures of the apostles, quizzing us on who is who. As we got older he changed it up and started asking us about scriptures, or who the four sons of Mosiah were- that one was my favorite question. We would finish naming all the apostles, and my dad would go on to talk about temples. At the time there was only one temple in Arizona. I know. The ancient days. He would talk about how there was only one temple in Arizona, and how there were a bunch in Utah, or California, or wherever, and then he would ask us how to get more temples in Arizona, and the answer was always the same- attend the temple.
We moved to Provo when I was seven so my dad could attend law school, and we lived right across the street from the temple. I remember my parents always going to the temple. It was so conveniently placed, right there across the street. I walked by it every day when I went to school. Since we were in Utah, we had a plethora of temples to see. We visited the Provo, Salt Lake, Logan, Monticello, Manti.... I mean, it's Utah. We got to see a lot of temples! We'd all pile out of the car- at the time there were only six of us kids, since Hyrum wasn't born until we moved to New Mexico- and dad would line us up and take pictures of us standing in front of the various temples. It's one of my favorite road trip memories.
When I was ten, my dad graduated from law school and my parents had to decide where to move. They started talking about New Mexico, and set a weekend aside for us to go on a trip to New Mexico. As we were preparing to go, they discovered that the weekend we were going was also the during the time that the Albuquerque temple open house was occurring. They took that as a sign to move there. We went down to New Mexico one weekend in February, went to the open house, and it was pretty much decided that we were moving there. I don't remember much of the open house besides standing in line forever, but I do remember that we took time out of our trip to attend the open house. Later, my older sister, Lydia, would get married there. I didn't realize what an important temple that was going to become in my life when we went to the open house.
Soon after my dad graduated and we moved to New Mexico, the Snowflake, Arizona temple was announced. I remember how excited my parents were. I was too young to really understand the push President Hinckley was making to cover the earth with temples, but this temple I felt the excitement for. Finally, our Arizona was getting another temple. As we drove back and forth from New Mexico to Arizona for family events, my dad would drive us out of the way so we could stop and see the Snowflake temple. It took years to complete, and we didn't get to go to the open house, but we did get to see the excitement of the temple being built.
I turned 12 about a year after we moved to New Mexico, which meant that I got to start attending the temple! It was exciting! Since there is only one temple in New Mexico, and it was a little ways away from where we lived, we only did youth trips about 4 times a year. It was so exciting though! I had grown up singing "I love to see the temple, I'm going there someday!" and all of sudden it was true! I was there. The Albuquerque temple is beautiful. As we moved various times around Albuquerque, the one constant was the temple. All my youth temple trips were to the Albuquerque temple. It stood so majestically above the city that I have grown to love and miss with all my heart. I remember my senior year of high school when we were driving to a band competition, we passed the temple and everyone started to make comments to me about the trumpet on top, and about how many of them, not LDS, had attended the open house, back in 2000, when it was open. I had attended school with many of these people for years and never knew that about them! I was so surprised that the influence of the temple extended to so many of my friends.
When I graduated from high school, I moved up to Rexburg, Idaho, to attend college at Brigham Young University- Idaho. The Rexburg temple had just been dedicated the winter term prior to my starting school (that was 2008 for those who forgot), and being in a small Mormon college town meant that it was constantly packed. I usually went early mornings on ward trips, or on Saturday mornings- working two jobs and being a full time student restricted much of the flexibility that would have allowed me to attend during the weekdays. I was constantly reminded by the faculty that the Rexburg temple was the students temple. The others of the community were encouraged to attend the Idaho Falls temple, half an hour way, so as to allow the students to take full advantage of the blessings of the temple. It was so great. I had class up in the Ricks building most days, as I was a history major, and sometimes would just go straight from class to the temple, if one of my morning classes was cancelled. It was so cool! A five minute walk from one university to another. That was really when the temple started feeling like home. So many wonderful blessings, revelations, guidance, and peace came from attending the temple. I wish I had attended more often. Sure, I was overwhelmed with work and school and roommates and boys, but really, the temple would have only eased that stress. It's one of my only regrets from college, and it is something I am always encouraging my younger siblings to do, now that they are at BYU-Idaho.
One year, during the break in between Winter and Spring semesters, I went on a road trip to California with some friends. We spent a week touring LA, going to Six Flags, the beach, Hollywood.... wow! So fun! Probably my favorite day, though, was the one we spent at the LA temple. That has forever become one of my favorite temples. It was just the four of us, and Racheal and I could only go into part of the temple, so the boys, who had attended the Rexburg temple with us, went with us to do baptisms, which was really great. I love that temple because it is located in LA, right in this noisy, crazy, busy, loud city. It was the biggest contrast being outside, and then getting to go in. I had never experienced that. The Albuquerque temple is located in a pretty quiet part of the city, and the Rexburg temple is.... well, it's Rexburg. Not much noise there. This contrast stood out to me so much. I finally understood not just the symbolic escape, but also the real life escape the temple is. I of course had felt peace and calm in the temple from the stress of the world before, but this moment of noise to peace was so unexpected, it made me see the temple in an entirely new light.
I graduated from college and moved here, to Salt Lake City. That first year was hard. I wanted to be home with my family. I'd just spent three years off at school, which meant I missed birthdays, holidays, graduations, the birth of my first nephew, my brother getting home from his mission, and all the other family fun. Most importantly, I missed my youngest brother, Hyrum. He's my favorite. Moving to Salt Lake only happened because I felt like this was where I needed to be. It was so hard to accept that I was needed away from my family. It was even harder moving here, where family is apparently something you never move from. Everyone here has family five minutes away- not just an aunt or distant cousin, but the full extended family- and they seemed to be having family functions every time I turned around. I felt so lonely that first year. I also was super homesick. I spent most of college fighting homesickness... the countless nights I spent crying myself to sleep because of how much I missed my family stayed strong after I graduated. That first year was the hardest. I struggled with why I was in Salt Lake, my job was awful, I didn't have a lot of money to do anything.... life was rough.
And then... one day... I went to the temple. It changed my life. So many things happened because of that one temple trip. And then... I kept going.
And finally, at the beginning of last year, I made the goal to attend the temple every week. I have never grown more as a person than in this past year and a half. Looking back, my life seems so hazy before I made the temple a weekly visit. I know you're thinking it's because our memories grow hazy as we get older, but this is different. I knew what I needed to do, and was living a righteous life, but life took on even more purpose. I was pushed to be even better; to live each day with more purpose; to live up to my potential. My potential seemed even higher than it was before. I'm not trying to sound prideful; in fact, I'm going for the opposite. I became even more and more aware of how much I depended on the Lord, and what my life was without him. I felt like I was in Lehi's dream, where all the fog is surrounding me, and I started going to the temple, and not only was I grasping the rod even harder, but I could also see the end goal more clearly, and that made the journey easier. Well, not easier- I still have a lot of trials. I still need to work on a lot of things- turns out I have a lot of weaknesses.
That was probably the hardest part about going to the temple- seeing all my weaknesses more strongly each week. At first it was overwhelming. There was a point last year where all I wanted to do was cry because of how imperfect I was. It took me a few months to really truly understand the atonement, and what it meant to be imperfect and rely on the Lord. I don't think I've ever really understood it like that before. We can't be perfect here on this earth. This realization came at the same time when I realized I'm a little OCD and a control freak. It was a lot to discover about myself, but my friends lovingly told me I'd always been that way, I'd just never realized it. How nice. Anyway, I realized I couldn't let the fact that I was imperfect hold me down. I needed to turn my weaknesses over to the Lord and let Him walk me through them. One of the biggest weaknesses that was removed was my homesickness. I was serious when I said it was something I really struggled with. I almost dropped out of college a couple of times because of how homesick I was. I didn't think I would ever get over it. But, going to the temple has helped put eternity into perspective. I really don't ever feel homesick like that anymore. Sure, I miss my family, and I wish we could all be together- coming from a family of nine makes that hard, though. I think that's been one of the best tender mercies the Lord has given me. Love for my family, without the pain that comes from being away from them. So many other things have changed in my life from going to the temple, but that was the first one that I really noticed. It wasn't something I was looking for, it was just something the Lord saw fit to bless me with. I'm so grateful He did.
We have monthly Single Adult Chapel Sessions in the Salt Lake Temple, where all the single adults gather and get to hear someone from the Stake Presidency, as well as one of the Temple Presidency and their wife speak. It's become one of my favorite things. I love getting to hear council from people who basically live in the temple. It's beautiful. This past week the emphasis was on obedience. President Fillmore spoke, and shared what President Eyring told him to share with us- God keeps all His promises; we need to work harder on keeping ours. I loved that! I know it's true. God has promised so many blessings from obeying His commandments, and I have time and time again witnessed and experienced those blessings.
Sister Fillmore shared an experience about a family member who recently returned from a mission. Right after he got his mission call, he got his patriarchal blessing. In the blessing he was told to read his scriptures, pray, and to stay out of the water on his mission. I'm not sure where he served, but it was somewhere near water, because he said he didn't know what the blessing was talking about; him and his companion went to the beach every P-Day, and were fine. Sister Fillmore went on to talk about how frustrated she was with this boy who was downplaying God's warning, and why nothing had had happened to him, when she realized that something had happened. He was no longer active in the church. He could not enter the temple. This warning had not been about the water, but about obedience. I think that's what trips people up with the gospel- they think that God is stopping us from doing something, but really He's testing how obedient we will be. The more obedient we are, the more humble we are, and to be humble is to be teachable, therefore if we follow His commandments, we can be taught by God. Isn't that interesting? People think that we should magically get whatever we want with no effort. It's called entitlement.
I remember President Clark, the president of BYU-Idaho, giving a talk on the dangers of entitlement back when I was in college, and I see it so present today. A child who tries to sue her parents because she didn't like the rules they set; a terrorist who believes he can harm and kidnap people because he wants things his way; social media that tells us that if we don't believe what they tell us, we are being racist, old-fashioned, behind the times.... all of these things are ever present in our day, and it is because people feel entitled to all that they want. I don't know about the rest of you, but the world just feels so chaotic to me. The world and the people in it are very wishy-washy, constantly changing their views on something, going with what's popular, and not right. I've always liked that quote "What's always popular is not always right, and what's always right is not always what's popular." I see the world going down the path of what's popular, and not what's right, and the more it does that, the more inclined I am to turn to the Lord and ask Him to guide my life. I have seen too many politicians, actors, teachers, and bosses succumb to cheating, lying, stealing, hurting.... scandal after scandal of what they wanted, and not what was right... why would I want to depend on them? God never changes. His laws are eternal. The Law of Chastity will always be there, even if the world refuses to follow it. The family and the definitions of a man and woman are eternal, whether the world's laws change or not. Truth is truth, whether people believe it or not. Going to the temple has helped me to see that even more clearly. I have come to rely on the Lord simply because He is reliable.
In January of this year, the Ensign printed an article by President Uchtdorf about "The Best Time to Plant a Tree." In the message, he quoted an old proverb that has really struck me. It says "The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is now." I love that. I have thought a lot about that as I've been attending the temple. I'm so grateful I was obedient to the spiritual prompting at the beginning of last year, as well as the temple Presidency's call to make the temple a weekly event. I keep thinking of all the blessings I would have missed out on if I had failed to be obedient. The temple has truly become my home away from home. I encourage all of you to attend the the temple regularly if you have a recommend; if you don't, fix your life so you can! The blessings are too great to be missing out, and in this day and age when we really don't have great examples in the spotlight, we can find the best example in the temple- Christ. And He will never let us down.
We moved to Provo when I was seven so my dad could attend law school, and we lived right across the street from the temple. I remember my parents always going to the temple. It was so conveniently placed, right there across the street. I walked by it every day when I went to school. Since we were in Utah, we had a plethora of temples to see. We visited the Provo, Salt Lake, Logan, Monticello, Manti.... I mean, it's Utah. We got to see a lot of temples! We'd all pile out of the car- at the time there were only six of us kids, since Hyrum wasn't born until we moved to New Mexico- and dad would line us up and take pictures of us standing in front of the various temples. It's one of my favorite road trip memories.
When I was ten, my dad graduated from law school and my parents had to decide where to move. They started talking about New Mexico, and set a weekend aside for us to go on a trip to New Mexico. As we were preparing to go, they discovered that the weekend we were going was also the during the time that the Albuquerque temple open house was occurring. They took that as a sign to move there. We went down to New Mexico one weekend in February, went to the open house, and it was pretty much decided that we were moving there. I don't remember much of the open house besides standing in line forever, but I do remember that we took time out of our trip to attend the open house. Later, my older sister, Lydia, would get married there. I didn't realize what an important temple that was going to become in my life when we went to the open house.
Soon after my dad graduated and we moved to New Mexico, the Snowflake, Arizona temple was announced. I remember how excited my parents were. I was too young to really understand the push President Hinckley was making to cover the earth with temples, but this temple I felt the excitement for. Finally, our Arizona was getting another temple. As we drove back and forth from New Mexico to Arizona for family events, my dad would drive us out of the way so we could stop and see the Snowflake temple. It took years to complete, and we didn't get to go to the open house, but we did get to see the excitement of the temple being built.
I turned 12 about a year after we moved to New Mexico, which meant that I got to start attending the temple! It was exciting! Since there is only one temple in New Mexico, and it was a little ways away from where we lived, we only did youth trips about 4 times a year. It was so exciting though! I had grown up singing "I love to see the temple, I'm going there someday!" and all of sudden it was true! I was there. The Albuquerque temple is beautiful. As we moved various times around Albuquerque, the one constant was the temple. All my youth temple trips were to the Albuquerque temple. It stood so majestically above the city that I have grown to love and miss with all my heart. I remember my senior year of high school when we were driving to a band competition, we passed the temple and everyone started to make comments to me about the trumpet on top, and about how many of them, not LDS, had attended the open house, back in 2000, when it was open. I had attended school with many of these people for years and never knew that about them! I was so surprised that the influence of the temple extended to so many of my friends.
When I graduated from high school, I moved up to Rexburg, Idaho, to attend college at Brigham Young University- Idaho. The Rexburg temple had just been dedicated the winter term prior to my starting school (that was 2008 for those who forgot), and being in a small Mormon college town meant that it was constantly packed. I usually went early mornings on ward trips, or on Saturday mornings- working two jobs and being a full time student restricted much of the flexibility that would have allowed me to attend during the weekdays. I was constantly reminded by the faculty that the Rexburg temple was the students temple. The others of the community were encouraged to attend the Idaho Falls temple, half an hour way, so as to allow the students to take full advantage of the blessings of the temple. It was so great. I had class up in the Ricks building most days, as I was a history major, and sometimes would just go straight from class to the temple, if one of my morning classes was cancelled. It was so cool! A five minute walk from one university to another. That was really when the temple started feeling like home. So many wonderful blessings, revelations, guidance, and peace came from attending the temple. I wish I had attended more often. Sure, I was overwhelmed with work and school and roommates and boys, but really, the temple would have only eased that stress. It's one of my only regrets from college, and it is something I am always encouraging my younger siblings to do, now that they are at BYU-Idaho.
One year, during the break in between Winter and Spring semesters, I went on a road trip to California with some friends. We spent a week touring LA, going to Six Flags, the beach, Hollywood.... wow! So fun! Probably my favorite day, though, was the one we spent at the LA temple. That has forever become one of my favorite temples. It was just the four of us, and Racheal and I could only go into part of the temple, so the boys, who had attended the Rexburg temple with us, went with us to do baptisms, which was really great. I love that temple because it is located in LA, right in this noisy, crazy, busy, loud city. It was the biggest contrast being outside, and then getting to go in. I had never experienced that. The Albuquerque temple is located in a pretty quiet part of the city, and the Rexburg temple is.... well, it's Rexburg. Not much noise there. This contrast stood out to me so much. I finally understood not just the symbolic escape, but also the real life escape the temple is. I of course had felt peace and calm in the temple from the stress of the world before, but this moment of noise to peace was so unexpected, it made me see the temple in an entirely new light.
I graduated from college and moved here, to Salt Lake City. That first year was hard. I wanted to be home with my family. I'd just spent three years off at school, which meant I missed birthdays, holidays, graduations, the birth of my first nephew, my brother getting home from his mission, and all the other family fun. Most importantly, I missed my youngest brother, Hyrum. He's my favorite. Moving to Salt Lake only happened because I felt like this was where I needed to be. It was so hard to accept that I was needed away from my family. It was even harder moving here, where family is apparently something you never move from. Everyone here has family five minutes away- not just an aunt or distant cousin, but the full extended family- and they seemed to be having family functions every time I turned around. I felt so lonely that first year. I also was super homesick. I spent most of college fighting homesickness... the countless nights I spent crying myself to sleep because of how much I missed my family stayed strong after I graduated. That first year was the hardest. I struggled with why I was in Salt Lake, my job was awful, I didn't have a lot of money to do anything.... life was rough.
And then... one day... I went to the temple. It changed my life. So many things happened because of that one temple trip. And then... I kept going.
And finally, at the beginning of last year, I made the goal to attend the temple every week. I have never grown more as a person than in this past year and a half. Looking back, my life seems so hazy before I made the temple a weekly visit. I know you're thinking it's because our memories grow hazy as we get older, but this is different. I knew what I needed to do, and was living a righteous life, but life took on even more purpose. I was pushed to be even better; to live each day with more purpose; to live up to my potential. My potential seemed even higher than it was before. I'm not trying to sound prideful; in fact, I'm going for the opposite. I became even more and more aware of how much I depended on the Lord, and what my life was without him. I felt like I was in Lehi's dream, where all the fog is surrounding me, and I started going to the temple, and not only was I grasping the rod even harder, but I could also see the end goal more clearly, and that made the journey easier. Well, not easier- I still have a lot of trials. I still need to work on a lot of things- turns out I have a lot of weaknesses.
That was probably the hardest part about going to the temple- seeing all my weaknesses more strongly each week. At first it was overwhelming. There was a point last year where all I wanted to do was cry because of how imperfect I was. It took me a few months to really truly understand the atonement, and what it meant to be imperfect and rely on the Lord. I don't think I've ever really understood it like that before. We can't be perfect here on this earth. This realization came at the same time when I realized I'm a little OCD and a control freak. It was a lot to discover about myself, but my friends lovingly told me I'd always been that way, I'd just never realized it. How nice. Anyway, I realized I couldn't let the fact that I was imperfect hold me down. I needed to turn my weaknesses over to the Lord and let Him walk me through them. One of the biggest weaknesses that was removed was my homesickness. I was serious when I said it was something I really struggled with. I almost dropped out of college a couple of times because of how homesick I was. I didn't think I would ever get over it. But, going to the temple has helped put eternity into perspective. I really don't ever feel homesick like that anymore. Sure, I miss my family, and I wish we could all be together- coming from a family of nine makes that hard, though. I think that's been one of the best tender mercies the Lord has given me. Love for my family, without the pain that comes from being away from them. So many other things have changed in my life from going to the temple, but that was the first one that I really noticed. It wasn't something I was looking for, it was just something the Lord saw fit to bless me with. I'm so grateful He did.
We have monthly Single Adult Chapel Sessions in the Salt Lake Temple, where all the single adults gather and get to hear someone from the Stake Presidency, as well as one of the Temple Presidency and their wife speak. It's become one of my favorite things. I love getting to hear council from people who basically live in the temple. It's beautiful. This past week the emphasis was on obedience. President Fillmore spoke, and shared what President Eyring told him to share with us- God keeps all His promises; we need to work harder on keeping ours. I loved that! I know it's true. God has promised so many blessings from obeying His commandments, and I have time and time again witnessed and experienced those blessings.
Sister Fillmore shared an experience about a family member who recently returned from a mission. Right after he got his mission call, he got his patriarchal blessing. In the blessing he was told to read his scriptures, pray, and to stay out of the water on his mission. I'm not sure where he served, but it was somewhere near water, because he said he didn't know what the blessing was talking about; him and his companion went to the beach every P-Day, and were fine. Sister Fillmore went on to talk about how frustrated she was with this boy who was downplaying God's warning, and why nothing had had happened to him, when she realized that something had happened. He was no longer active in the church. He could not enter the temple. This warning had not been about the water, but about obedience. I think that's what trips people up with the gospel- they think that God is stopping us from doing something, but really He's testing how obedient we will be. The more obedient we are, the more humble we are, and to be humble is to be teachable, therefore if we follow His commandments, we can be taught by God. Isn't that interesting? People think that we should magically get whatever we want with no effort. It's called entitlement.
I remember President Clark, the president of BYU-Idaho, giving a talk on the dangers of entitlement back when I was in college, and I see it so present today. A child who tries to sue her parents because she didn't like the rules they set; a terrorist who believes he can harm and kidnap people because he wants things his way; social media that tells us that if we don't believe what they tell us, we are being racist, old-fashioned, behind the times.... all of these things are ever present in our day, and it is because people feel entitled to all that they want. I don't know about the rest of you, but the world just feels so chaotic to me. The world and the people in it are very wishy-washy, constantly changing their views on something, going with what's popular, and not right. I've always liked that quote "What's always popular is not always right, and what's always right is not always what's popular." I see the world going down the path of what's popular, and not what's right, and the more it does that, the more inclined I am to turn to the Lord and ask Him to guide my life. I have seen too many politicians, actors, teachers, and bosses succumb to cheating, lying, stealing, hurting.... scandal after scandal of what they wanted, and not what was right... why would I want to depend on them? God never changes. His laws are eternal. The Law of Chastity will always be there, even if the world refuses to follow it. The family and the definitions of a man and woman are eternal, whether the world's laws change or not. Truth is truth, whether people believe it or not. Going to the temple has helped me to see that even more clearly. I have come to rely on the Lord simply because He is reliable.
In January of this year, the Ensign printed an article by President Uchtdorf about "The Best Time to Plant a Tree." In the message, he quoted an old proverb that has really struck me. It says "The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is now." I love that. I have thought a lot about that as I've been attending the temple. I'm so grateful I was obedient to the spiritual prompting at the beginning of last year, as well as the temple Presidency's call to make the temple a weekly event. I keep thinking of all the blessings I would have missed out on if I had failed to be obedient. The temple has truly become my home away from home. I encourage all of you to attend the the temple regularly if you have a recommend; if you don't, fix your life so you can! The blessings are too great to be missing out, and in this day and age when we really don't have great examples in the spotlight, we can find the best example in the temple- Christ. And He will never let us down.
Comments
Post a Comment